WAGMI

Everyone is trying to "make it." So much so that we even created an acronym for it: WAGMI (we all gonna make it). But once we finally make it…then what?

We want it. We get it. And then it's almost like having it is not as satisfying as pursuing it. Arriving is not as exciting as going. Maybe making it is better than having made it.

"Congratulations! Here's your achievement award!" You enjoy your celebratory dinner, maybe appear in quick TV interview and a news article. You trend for a couple hours on Twitter and YouTube…and then … what?

Maybe fame isn't your thing.

Buy that car, that house, that boat, take that dream vacation… then what?

Think about the infamous horse chasing the carrot dangling in front of him on a stick. He ran himself ragged trying to get it. Then he got it, gobbled it up like Joey Chestnut eating a hot dog, and looked around and realized… apples are better.

No. He thought, "Now what am I supposed to do with myself?"

Goals not Obligations

We have goals. We want to experience things in our lives. We need to have something more than obligations motivating us to get out of bed. That goal is beyond our reach in the present moment, but if we grow and change, we can realize that goal. Countless young men have told me they want to get rich so they can buy their mom a house. I've heard others speak about how they want to retire by 40 years old. And others who say they just want to provide a better life for their children than the poverty they themselves grew up in. Those are respectable goals. But let's keep thinking about this.

What things have you accomplished in life that now do not or cannot motivate you? You worked, sacrificed and invested your time and energy, blood, sweat and tears, to make it. And you made it. Or maybe you got it. Whatever it was: Congratulations! But how long ago was that? I'm guessing that trophy is collecting dust now. Or whatever award it was, it probably does not move you like it did at first. And you definitely want a newer phone by now.

Why? Because winning is not fun? Completing that challenging task was not fulfilling? Holding it in your hands for the first time wasn't thrilling? No. It's because the fun is IN the winning. The fulfillment is IN completing the task. The meaning of the moment is created WHILE you stretch and strive and chase that carrot on the end of the stick. You tell yourself all the reasons why and what you will do once you have it. The journey is worth as much as the specific reward at the end of the road. And sometimes more.

Fun is in the Winning

We should learn to appreciate what happens in us during that process for a couple reasons. Hopefully, the growth we experience is useful beyond those few hours or months or years pursuing whatever goal we had. The person we become will last longer than the attention we get. The character development will be produce more contentment than the emotional high of taking a picture to commemorate the moment.

Also, because we are built to respond to incentives, remember? We are made for challenges. There will always be something more; something worth pursuing or solving. That's just the way it is. Tell me if I'm wrong.

Li'l Wayne expressed it one way when he rapped, "The top got higher the more that I climbed." Tom Brady said his favorite Super Bowl ring is "the next one." Elon Musk is still trying to get to Mars.

This pursuit will either exhaust you, or you will learn to enjoy it. It will deplete you or enrich you. It will be your undoing or your reason for doing. If the process of making it is hurting you, ask yourself if that really is the right goal. If the process is causing you to lose out on relationships and makes you lonely, maybe you need to reassess the goal or your methods. The process should be building something in you and around you that will preserve contentment after you finally win. It is greater than winning.

The fun is in the winning.

Wealth is in the giving.

Life is in the living.

Christ is in the Christian.

I haven't made it, but I'm learning to enjoy making it.